Cancelled

So, we've had a bit of snow this week. We got a foot dumped on us on Tuesday afternoon. Luckily, Chris made it to school Monday and Tuesday, but he's had the rest of the week off. He's been bugging me daily to ride the Bus. Weird for him and I. His appointment at Riley was cancelled on Tuesday because his specialist couldn't make it in. I was actually a bit bummed about that. Tuesday, though, he made my day, he literally split my lunch with me, I didn't have to bug him once and he ate more than 20 bites of cheesy bread. (cheesey lean pockets) I lost count! When was the last time that happened? Then he told me he wanted to cuddle (Tayos). Something about all this snow is making him eat better, not large quantities, he's still down to 2-3 drinks a day, but for example he's been requesting Applesauce, And eating it! Maybe the Periactin is doing a good thing.

But we've kept him busy. Wednesday we took a break from massive Snow Day TV watching (the entire PBS morning lineup) to go out and play in the snow. Chris was apprehensive at first, but when I told him that we were going to build a Snowman. He was thrilled.



He wore his same snowsuit from last year, as it still fit. There's a perk for a boy not growing, and he was adorable. He was definitely braver than last year. We didn't have to pull him into the snow, he just followed Mommy. He thought I was crazy when I flopped down to do a Snow Angel. He teetered back and forth for a bit, but as he usually work so hard to NOT fall down, falling down on purpose was a whole new concept. I gave him a tip, and into the snow he went, and he made a great snow angel. Getting up was a bit trickier, as we both got a bit stuck. After Snow Angels, we worked hard on making a Snowman. It wasn't easy, because the snow was so light and fluffy, it just didn't want to pat down. However, that was the part Chris did best, pat pat pat. He'd pick up some snow and let it drift onto our snow man, or snowcone as he ended up looking more like. Chris's favorite part was decorating! I put the scarf on, and Chris just patted it and patted it. Then it was time for eyes, and I grabbed some dried flower pieces, just enough for eyes, nose, mouth. Chris didn't think it was enough, and kept trudging back to the garden for more parts. He was adorable, calling out "Need more Stits!" (sticks) If I hadn't put a stop to it, our snowman would've had 8 arms, and 5 noses.



Chris woke pretty much at 6:30 yesterday when the phone rang telling us Brownsburg had no school, which he wasn't headed there anyway. Today, they gave us advance warning, being polite and calling last night when we were still up! It was much was too early for him. Consequently, he was a boy on the edge. Yesterday, we actually left the house, and went up to the Trader's Point indoor park, and had a picnic lunch with our MOPS group. It was so much fun. The park is like a McDonald's or Chick Fil-A indoor playground, but on steroids, it's 2-3 stories tall, filling half the size of an elementary gymnasium. He started to get snipsy at the park, but every time I asked if he wanted to go home, he refused. But he didn't want to leave. In fact he melted down as I dragged him out. At one point, I saw him running with a Thomas the train. It wasn't ours, nor as it turned out did it belong to anyone from our group. Turns out it was a whistle, and I was NOT fast enough to stop him from blowing on it. So, mark my words, if he ends up sick again in the next couple days, I know it will be because of Typhoid Thomas. Once we got moving, he was ok, but he had such a good time, even though because he's so tiny, he can't climb all the stuff there is to climb, I was very proud that he was out there trying, with some of the bigger kids.



He remained fairly snipsy once we got home. He didn't want to nap, I finally had to curl up in bed with him, and he kept calling out. But last night, he slept much better. He just woke up instantly hollering to Watch TV. It's like if he has a choice, watch tv, or go to school. That's all he wants to do. Ever. You should see the meltdowns if I say no. We had 2 TV free days this week, and that was huge progress, sometimes I can have success with a tv free morning, but I'm done fighting by afternoon/evening. Today was not a morning for me to fight, he's watching SuperWhy, and he loves it. But it begs the question...Why do we have all these toys?

Let me leave you with a story that completely changes the subject, but had Mommy and Daddy rolling on the floor. The night before last, Eric and Chris were having Bath Time. Eric has discovered that bath time is a great time for him to do little things around the house, not too far away from the bathroom, popping in periodically to check on a boy, or play Peek-a-boo, while Mommy plays computer, or sews. Anyway, Eric popped back into the bathroom at one point, and Chris was mumbling to himself. Actually, more specifically, he was talking to his "Pee Pee".
Eric asked him, "Do you think your Peepee talks?
"Yes. It does." Chris replied calmly.
Curious, Eric asked, "What does it say?"
"I'm a Pee Pee!"

To Eat or not To Eat

The last couple weeks, mealtime has just been awful with Chris. He fights us at every turn. We would serve him multiple choices, and he won't eat any of them. Then we moved to asking him what he wants. Now, theoretically, he's 3, he knows enough language to tell me if he wants waffles or cereal. He just says NO to everything. Then he'll change his mind, we'll make him something, and Then he won't eat it. Or we ask him if he's done, and he'll say No, but then he's climbing out of the seat, not eating. God forbid we tell him he's done, after not eating for 20 minutes, and take the food away. Oh, once I took it, and gave his waffle bits to Fina, and he FLIPPED out. Yeah, Mealtime is rough.
Lately his language skills seem to be regressing, he's been growling, grunting, pointing, crying, and not telling us what's wrong. I notice it especially at mealtimes because he's not speaking English and it's so frustrating. A frustrating thing about Age Three, I think, because he's not the only one I know that does this, which actually kind of makes me feel better. At least I know it's partly a toddler thing, not a problem because he's not in First Steps anymore. By the way, he's due to start his new Developmental Therapies next week, now that he's in the groove at school. He Loves School. And a perk, he usually comes home thirsty. He bugs me about getting to ride the bus every day he's not on the bus, and even in the evenings when he has ridden the bus. This week, by the end of the day, after having argued with him at every meal, I'm just done. Our mealtimes are ruined by forcing bites down his gullet. He says he wants to do it himself, but he plays with the fork, and if we put food on the fork for him to do it himself, it ends up on the floor for Fina. So we force it, and he's gagging, crying, begging to hold our hands. He's miserable. We're miserable. Usually breakfast is about the only good meal for him, this week, that even wasn't the case. Many mealtimes ruined, and tears were had by all.
So, I've been laying off. Today, I didn't serve him breakfast, I asked him if he wanted his cocoa when he woke up, and he said no, so he got nothing. Easier to do that then on a school day where if he doesn't eat breakfast, he doesn't get any. Instead, he wanted to play with toys, and I just let him, rather than forcing him to the table. Half an hour later, he came up to me and told me he wanted a snack. I reinforced it was breakfast time, and though he didn't appreciate the terminology, he actually climbed up into the chair, and ate. Granted it was only a third of an apple, and a half cup of milk, but he did it by himself, and I wasn't in tears by the end of the meal. Progress. I can't take the stress of it. In theory, I recall reading, he'll come to me when he's hungry, especially if this medication starts to stimulate his appetite. Now that's meant that for the last couple days, a meal consists of just a couple bites of whatever. 1/2 a rice krispie treat, a few bites of apple. But I don't have to fight him. I'm not losing my temper. I don't want to be giving him a some complex where he'll end up an anorexic teenager. He's only drinking 2 cans a day of milk, they want more like 3 or 4, but he just won't. He wants "cocoa" which is his milk with chocolate sauce. He doesn't want us calling it chocolate milk, he'll correct us. But he'll willingly drink cocoa, not milk. I'm happy if he completes 2 whole cans, but that's only about 500 calories. I don't think he's going to be gaining much weight this way, but at least he's not dreading climbing into his seat...or at least he didn't today.
I have some hope, Tuesday we have another appointment with our Feeding Team gal, and a weight check. Hopefully, there will be good news there.

A Letter on Inauguration Day

Dear Chris,
Sometimes I write on here to everybody, and sometimes just to you. Today is a bit of both, I guess. We watched the Presidential Inauguration this afternoon. You had preschool, and I was pleased to find out it was going to be on AFTER your preschool class. It's been a great day; it was Show and Tell at school, you brought Larry the Cucumber, who you've been calling Noya Tuyatumber, and we brought Fina to school to talk about Pets. You were just saying, It's a Fina! It was a lot of fun. You wanted to see Fina when we were all done, but I told you we were going to go home and watch the inauguration.
You were ecstatic. I think you only heard, "we're gonna watch...". You love to watch TV, and on school days you don't get much of it. You chanted about getting to watch the TV all the way home. I tried to tell you we were going to watch Barack Obama, I tried to get you to say his name, but you just said, "Bat Omama". We stopped for McDonald's on the way home, and had a picnic on the floor of the basement, while we watched the Inauguration. I was amazed at how during the processions, you were actually interested. You loved watching the musicians perform, and I think you were partial to all the military people in their pretty fancy uniforms. Me too! We practiced saying Barack Obama, you ranged from "Brato yo mama" to "Ba'k' Yomama" and just "Bat O mama". When he finally came out, we cheered just like the rest of the country, you even clapped and said Yeah too.

You may remember this day, when we watched the 44th President take the Oath of Office. I'd like to think you will. I hope that what you will not remember is that there was even a time when you were alive, when it was considered impossible for an African American to hold the highest public office, the presidency. Not in your lifetime now. I didn't vote for him, but that's not to say I didn't consider it, but there were of his some ideas I didn't agree with. But when he won the election, I couldn't help but join the rest of the country in this overwhelming movement of Hope.

Today, as we watched, I watched you, every time he spoke of hope I looked at you. You didn't sit still for his whole speech, but you sat in my lap for most of it. You are our hope, our country's next generation, Full of Hope. I want you to be full of hope too. All the time. As a country, sure, we've been burned, it's tricky times right now, but yet, we're not going to let it get us down. It's almost like, well, if HE can become President, than Anything is Possible.

Honey, Anything is Possible. With God, Anything is Possible. Remember that.

Where's my sweetboy?

I'm tired. Tired of fighting a battle at every meal. Every meal. We've reverted back to where we were over a year ago. Chris is "feeling better" from his 3 weeks of varying illness. At least I think he is. His eyes look good, he's not hacking up things, unless by choice. He's not on the feeding pump, so he hasn't been tube fed in months, and just living off of table food. Only he's not eating Table Food. While he was sick, he wasn't really eating OR drinking. At least now he's back to drinking better, 3 cans of milk a day. That brings me back to dinnertime. I think he's forgotten how to chew. We require he take 3 (very small) bites of whatever we're having for dinner. Theoretically, enough to try everything. But he doesn't. He doesn't want to, and it becomes a worse than giving medicine, where I have to hold his head still with one hand, Eric and I both screaming OPEN!, and the other hand does this super slick move of holding down his arms with a forearm while shoveling the spoon or fork into his mouth at the earliest sign of opening, or whenever he is forced to stop shaking his head back and forth. Then once he gets the bite in, 90% of the time, he starts gagging, like he tried to swallow it whole. (I'd estimate 10% of the time, we'll turn our heads, and he'll take a bite on his own. But not today.) CHEW!!! We yell. Chew! Chew! Chew! It's like he's forgotten. We sit there and model exaggerated chewing for him, and he watches us, gaggy face, teary eyes, flapping his hands trying to hold our hands, most of the time, not chewing. On the rare occasion, he spits the bite back out, and depending on what it was, we'll either force it back in, or break it up smaller for him. Every bite is like this. No wonder we cave at 3 bites. Every meal is like this lately.
OK, not every meal. We got high hopes yesterday. For lunch, Eric and I made buffalo chicken fingers leftover macaroni and cheese (for us, we knew he'd not go for it), and we made french toast sticks for Chris. Now, we'd just bought these sticks, and whereas I would've only made Chris 1 stick, Daddy made him 4! Then he sat down and told me he wanted "Nooloos!" (noodles) So I gave him a scoop of my macaroni and a fork, and DUDE, shock of shocks, he went to town. He finished that scoop and wanted more. 3 helpings later, we thought he was done, but NO! He finally started on the french toast sticks, which Daddy called Waffle Sticks, in an effort to convince him that this was a good thing. We were amazed. We couldn't look at him, we just sat there talking to each other, referring to all Chris was eating in code, because if we looked at him, or praised him, well, we probably would've cursed it, and then it would've been over. He ate 2 1/3 French Toast Sticks, and 3 1/2 scoops of macaroni and cheese (probably about the same as I ate in mac and cheese). Toss in there he drank 4 ounces of his 'cocoa' (his Bright Beginnings Soy with chocolate sauce, the way he likes his milk lately, he requires us to call it cocoa, "toto") and it was THE Biggest Meal he's eaten since before Christmas. We were so proud.
We were so hopeful.
Then by dinner, he didn't eat a thing, not even pizza! Just drank half a can of milk, sorry 'cocoa'. He's been getting quite good at correcting me. And then he was back in his rut today. Refusing ALL solid food, and fighting us at every turn. And growling at us, and yelling, and pointing. This morning we watched a bit of Veggie Tales before church, but he was not worthy of watching anything this evening, and that almost makes it worse. At least when he's watching tv, he's not screaming at me, or hitting me with crowbars or toilet wands. But TV is a reward, and when he misbehaves, he doesn't earn it.

Where is my Sweetboy? My boy who would eat baby food so sweetly and polish off jars of the stuff, who would sit and join me for breakfast? Not here This Evening. Eric suspects he's cranky. KranKee! Indeed. And it may be true, if so it's our own faults.
His GI gave him a script for a new medication when we saw her two weeks ago, for something called Periactin. It's technically an anti-histimine, but it's got a powerful side effect of appetite stimulation, and has been used fairly successfully for this. We put off starting him on it, because of his varying illnesses, and starting school, and all that. We thought that perhaps going on an anti-histimine, even at such a low dose as has been prescribed, might make him sleepy. That's the #1 side effect they predicted. Well, we're not seeing extra sleepy, we're seeing EXTRA SNIPPY! Though Eric points out that his behavior is more like that of one who has been deprived of a nap, or is ready for one. Rather than the days of old when he would just conk out in his bucket seat when he was sleepy, it's more like he's reverted back to the 12-18 month age of just fussing his head off when he's tired. Actually, that's fairly accurate too, because when he's snip-sniping at us, he doesn't use his words. At dinner time, he just flaps his hands at us, wanting us to hold his hand, but refusing to ask. We'll say, you want XYZ, ask nicely. He'll grump, growl, and literally say NO. He won't ask nicely, he'll just grump and growl at us.
At least Eric has been around to fend off some of the fuss this weekend, to share the load. Unfortunately, Daddy goes back to work tomorrow, and Chris does NOT have school. I hope we can play with friends who will bring him Joy.

What also boggles the mind is how fast he can turn the switch from sourpuss to sweetboy. One second I'll be counting him down into TimeOut, and he'll be at 2 and 3/4 and then he'll look at me, (he may actually tilt his head ever so sweetly) and say, "I need a hu"k"." (He still clicks his K sounds, and doesn't do Gs, so Hug, comes out Hu'k' or hud.) It's hard to resist, most of the time I just drop my fingers, all forgiven, and give him his hug. Is he manipulating me? At 3? Probably.
But he stopped screaming at me.
This evening, before dinnertime made the evening really sour, I was on the computer, and Chris was chasing Daddy around the house, as he put the Christmas stuff into the crawlspace. Chris kept trying to recruit Daddy to play with him, which was actually pretty cute. He knew Mama was pretty much done getting growled at, and BOTH of us had told him there was going to be No TV. So, he kept wandering up and down stairs, following Daddy. Only barely or mostly staying out of his way. We were both a bit relieved when to hear through the monitor that he was playing in his own room. That's a refreshing perk about this age, at least he's enjoying his room, and will go in on his own...for a few minutes anyway. We've also been really getting excited about his growing imagination. Later, he came downstairs, growling all the way, I turned around, and Eric and I both had to lauh, he was on the stairs, wearing his Pirates hat, holding a flopsy navy blue sock, waving it at us, "ARRRRRR!! I Tatan Hoo'k'." I don't know how he knew who Captain Hook was, he's not seen Peter Pan here, but he was being Captain Hook. He waved his sock, and told us, "I need a sword." Ummm. No. You are SO not worthy of Weaponry at this point. But it was pretty cute.
Then earlier this afternoon, Chris was playing with his Handy Manny Toolset in our bedroom. He has a pair of Saws (Dusty), one talks and the other doesn't. The two are often in kahootz. Well, Eric went to check on Chris who had been quiet for 2 seconds too long, and he came out laughing. Apparently the two saws were hugging, telling each other "I Yub You. I Yub You Too."
Oh, wait, there's my sweetboy.

Another one

Can you believe our house has been struck by illness AGAIN? Chris was up half the night coughing, and Mommy has developed a sore throat egged on by nasal drainage. The only one to expose Mommy has been Chris, but he's been doing a fine job of coughing in my face at the most inopportune times.
Last night, he was up until midnight, and then we noticed his aquarium was dying a horrible death, playing 30 seconds and trailing off into silence. It was pitiful. We didn't think Chris could sleep with that. So, Eric took it to fix it, but discovered we were out of batteries, so at midnight, he left it on the counter, and we went to bed. Again. Well, about 5:45 a.m. a scream sent me running across the house. I found Chris sitting straight up in bed, yelling "Sisit! Sisit!" (Music!) Apparently, HE did notice that his aquarium was missing, broken or not, and he did not appreciate it. I curled up in bed with him for an hour and a half, and he fought sleep for a good long time, kicking me and pulling my hair. I miss the days when we'd sleep together and he'd actually Sleep. These are not those days. Then I slinked out to get a power nap of my own until he woke again at 9! That was nicer, except that we all feel crummy.
So rude that we're all home sick. AGAIN. Although, it was -10 degrees out this morning, (-24 windchill...brrrrr) and they had cancelled school, though Chris wasn't going to have school anyway. It was supposed to have today off anyway. He only made it to school 1 Day this week. 1 day. 3 days last week, and 1 day this week. Theoretically 4 days next week, since he's off for MLK. It's funny how apprehensive I was about sending him to school 5 days a week. He's yet to do it. Boys today.

A New Look

For quite some time, it has been hinted to us that we ought to move on from the Classic Pooh motif for Christopher's website. Eric has been working hard, especially over the holiday breaks developing a new "Big Boy" look for Chris's website. Big Surprise. We chose Cars. It's a new look, and it's in kahootz with blogspot, and yet will still report to christopher.willman.com. We all like it.
With Baby #2 on the way, we think we'll reserve that setting for the new baby's blog...soon to be coming to Babywillman.com.
As I was putting the finishing touches on my entry last night, from a sound sleep, the boy calls, “I want waffles!” In his sleep, he wants waffles. Wish I could get him to eat, or want to eat in real life. He hasn't wanted to eat anything. Not even waffles. We force bites of solid food into him. I shouldn’t be too bummed, he’s bumped back up to drinking 3 cans of Bright Beginnings Soy a day. I know They would be happier if the drinking accompanied eating, but it seems like we can only get 1 at a time lately.
This morning the boy woke up at 6:45a.m. (after sleeping until 9 yesterday!) requesting VeggieTales. He did not get VeggieTales just because he Demanded them at 7 in the morning. He was a pip all morning, mostly demanding TV, and because he was not asking "nicely" he was not getting tv. He also developed Pink Eye in his other eye. However, we caught it as soon as he got up, and started him on the antibiotics. I called to confirm with Dr. Cooper that we could use the same drugs in both eyes, he said yes, and to let them know if we need more. He'll be able to resume school tomorrow, provided it doesn't get cancelled due to cold or icky weather. Gotta tell you, I'm ready to send the boy to school on the bus. I think he asked me (demanded) to ride bus 27 times today. Seriously. Noon could not come fast enough for naps. Thank goodness, Chris did sleep for almost 1 1/2 hours. But I think getting eye drops in both eyes stings a lot more, because he's been fighting the treatment a little bit more, especially the eye soaks. He takes it, but he's not festive. Tonight, he AND Daddy both took their eye medicine at the same time. It was pretty cute.

Daddy asked Christopher his name last week, he was told “Tris Tiffers Matthews Woonans tiffers Matthews” So there it is.
Welcome to Tris Tiffers Matthews Woonans Tiffers Matthews new website.

Jeesh

I recall a good few years where one disease or another would strike my in-law's family and we wouldn't see them for the entire month of January. Now it's going to be us. First we spend the first week of the New year in isolation, because we suspect that Chris may have had whooping cough. Then we get the ok to enter back into the public, and 4 days later� Chris has developed Pink Eye. Chris was able to attend preschool last week Tuesday through Friday. He was thrilled. He loves getting on the bus to go to Developmental Preschool. He has bugged us at least once every day since Friday to get on the bus. Unfortunately, he has to wait until Wednesday.

With this pink eye thing, he feels fine. Fine enough to drive me crazy. Just both Sunday morning and this morning, it's taken us a good long while for him to get his right eye open. I come in to get him up with a warm wet washcloth (of course it's stone hot when I rinse it, but by the time it gets to his face, it's just warm) and apply it, holding it to his eye, changing corners every 5 minutes or so, wiping gently, only once, so as to not hurt him but to pull the loose goopies out, never using the same section twice. Then the washcloth is done, and into the laundry it goes. It took 20 minutes for him to open his eye yesterday, and 15 this morning. Of course, during this mornings adventures, the phone range and the bus came by and I was applying eye soaks and was able to get neither. I gave the washcloth to Chris and he held it in place, and when I got back to him, he showed me he could open his eye. He was very proud he could do it himself. He's been less inclined to sit still for eye soaks as the days progress.

We got in to see Dr. Cooper today. He was just as grossed out by Chris's oozy eye as we were, though I told him, it actually looked worse yesterday morning. He gave us antibiotic eye drops, and sent us on our merry way. Oh, and Chris weighed in at 24 pounds 13 ounces at their office. 27 pounds dressed! (I knew dressed weights in winter were inaccurate.) He also told us that we'd gotten the 'preliminary' results back on his pertussis (whooping cough) test, and they were negative, but no word on the official whole test. He did tell us Chris can go back to school once he's been on the antibiotic eye drops for 24 hours, he made it sound like I could send him tomorrow, but that was cutting it a bit close for my taste, so he'll start back up on Wednesday. I have to give him the drops 4 times a day, we got it in 3 times today. I got some advice that I followed from friends, and I laid Chris on the changing table, and told him to close his eyes. He was flipping out when I came at him with the dropper bottle, but I told him it's eye medicine. He said, Like Daddy? Yes. Just like Daddy, such a smart boy. Daddy has been using drops daily the last 2 months since he had his lasik surgery. So Chris with his eyes closed, I just put a droplet in the corner, and it's cool because I can literally watch it slowly sink in with his eyes closed, though the theory is when he opens his eyes, it rolls into the eye. We haven't lost a dose yet. Of course, now that I've said that�.

Whew! Thank goodness, in other updates, Chris is NOT done with naps. We're thinking it was just an objection to the new routine. He didn't nap Wednesday or Thursday last week, and he was, well to put it lightly a horrendous beast those evenings. Friday, it took me 45 minutes, but indeed he did sleep after school and lunch. Given that he's MY child, he should be genetically predisposed to nap, and nap often. 3 is just too young. My sister and I stopped at 5, pretty much when we started all day school, but then picked up again as soon as high school was out, if not before. Luckily, Chris been napping well since Thursday. He took a 2 hour nap on Friday, and another hour and a half Sunday, and a whopping 2 ½ hours today. Apparently watching TV all morning, with a doctor visit chaser can wear a boy OUT.

Saturday Chris only got a half hour power nap in the car, as we drove from Butler to Game Night, but that's better than nothing. And it gave him just enough pep to pick up and play with his friends at Game Night. It's a good thing he did too, since we're back in isolation mode for a couple days. So, Saturday, we went to the Butler Game. Daddy got to play saxophone in the band, he hadn't played since Chris was born�at least. Chris and I were so proud. He kept pointing to the band, My Daddy! Mommy and Chris got in BECAUSE Daddy was playing in the band, however, the seats that are free with this perk were 4 rows from the top of Hinkle Fieldhouse. I have not ever watched a game from that high. Chris enjoyed it though, he could see the "Bastet-a-ball" and the Band at the same time. He kept watching the Bulldog mascot, but we weren't able to get close to him this trip. The team won. My boy is so well trained, he'd even join us in clapping to the Butler War Song. Being up at the top of Hinkle, we were seated on benches for the first half, and Chris spent most of that time, crawling on the benches, crawling over the benches, on the floor by the benches. He kept wiping at his eye, and I noticed a tiny scratch, likely from a long fingernail from his temple to his eye. Not sure if the scratch is what set off the pink eye, or if his climbing all over Hinkle Fieldhouse, and then sticking his hands in his eye is what finally sent him over the edge. He just kept wiping it, and I didn't think much of it, until we got him home, and were bathing him, and we noticed he just kept tearing and the goopies kept coming. By 10 pm we were pretty sure it was pink eye, and we'd gone to Game Night, and Chris had played with all his girlfriends, and we had to call them all and tell them.

At least he was being a pistol unintentionally this time. Friday, when he came home from school, at first I was totally enchanted. I unpacked his backpack, and there was a construction paper artwork inside, before unfolding it, I asked, What is this? He told me Huddy Dutty. Upon opening, I realized it was a picture of Humpty Dumpty, and Chris told me how he was "on a wa'ooo" (on the wall). I was so proud he was telling me his story, that I just listened to him babble at me through lunch, which he actually ate, because he'd been too excited about taking the bus to eat breakfast that day. Well, then his sweetboy talk turned to growlipants talk. He's been doing this growl, at me, his friends, even his toys. He gets mouthy, talks back. Even when he gets yelled at, he's like trying to growl in the last word. Well, it's not been going over well, and Friday as lunch was ending, he got a Time Out for yelling at me. I think he may have wanted to watch TV, and I likely said no. I'm a little fuzzy on what started the initial timeout.
As I was putting him Time Out, he continued to growl and yell at me. The Time Out for this behavior was going to be very effective, if he hasn't stopped the behavior before the �punishment'. More Time Out works sometimes, but the threat had no effect on him this time, I don't even think he heard me. I was at wit's end, and in my frustration, I told him "Do you want a spanking?" He quieted up and didn't say a word. Well, I didn't want to actually give it, so I turned and said, then be quiet and take your time out, and I set the timer and ran out of the room. Then he started calling, "I want spank!" Repeatedly. Over and over, through the monitor he cried, I want spank! I'm fairly sure he didn't know what a spanking was, he hasn't had anything more than cheek flicks in years. The last time I swatted his bottom, when he ran away from me into the dogs cage, I don't think he even felt it. I called Daddy for reinforcement, and we discussed, since a. I used the threat, and b. he was asking for it, c. perhaps it was time for a spanking. Great.

So I did. I went back upstairs, sat down on Chris's toy chest, and told him to come here, it was time for a spanking. Unbelievably, he came. I laid him down, over my lap (a position not natural for him, as he hates being precarious on his tummy), and I spanked him. 1. 2. 3. 3 good swats. Not enough to hurt either him or I, but enough that I'm sure he felt it through the diaper. Then quietly, I picked him up and sat him on the edge of his bed, and left the room. He began to cry. I began to cry. I took a minute to pull myself together and went back in for our �talk'. I told him to come over, which he did, and I sat him on my lap, and I told him All Done Time Out, and All Done Spanking. He said All Done spank? Yes. I was tempted to apologize, because I felt just terrible about hitting him, however I knew that I had to discipline. I was trying but having trouble conveying to him how I have to discipline him, and I told him it was because I love him. He has to learn how to be nice, and talk nice to people, especially his Mommy and Daddy. And during a gap, when I was trying to find the words, he just leaned into me, almost hugging me, "May Timmas Mommy."

Yeah, I give him a spanking, and he tells me Merry Christmas. Jeesh.

First Days

What a wild and wooly week it's been, and it's not even over. Tuesday was Chris's first day back at Preschool. He was thrilled to get back at school. On the way home, I asked him what he did at school. I ask him every time, but mostly I get no answers, and I have to use the paperwork they sent home as prompts to ask yes or no questions, or questions with one word answers. Open-ended questions don't really work with my three year old. As I drove, he told me "Mr. Rates sabba sout." After some minutes of diagnosis, I deduced that his teacher Mrs. R got the toys out. Once I got that part of the discussion, he told me, "I play Elmos." apparently, he played with the Elmo toys she got out. I would not have gotten that from the worksheets. I was very proud of Chris.

About to get prouder. Yesterday, Chris went to Developmental Preschool for the first time. On The Bus. Chris was thrilled. He literally bounced out of bed when I told him he was going to go to new school on the bus. The bus came for Chris and we were ready, he with his new Cars backpack, and us with camera and videocamera, and we played it up like getting on that bus was the best thing since sliced bread. And he was so excited. He had to have help climbing up the steps, they were taller than his knees. He turned at the top, told us bye bye, he smiled and he was gone.

Mommy blubbered as soon as the bus started moving, and for a good hour. I don't know why it was so hard, I've been dropping him off at preschool at the church for months, but this time was different. This time, strange busdriving men came and took him away, and for a minute I couldn't even remember the name of the school. Eagle by the way. It was so quiet around here....the waiting for the afternoon bus was so much harder than dropping him off and picking him up ever has been. Three is so young, it feels too young to be putting my sweet boy on a bus. But he did great. How uncool is that? Mommy was a basket case and Chris came home, thrilled and happy. I had to Trust in a higher power that he would be fine, and he was. His teacher sent a note home telling me how he played with dinosaurs, and sand, and how he spilled water all over his pants at snacktime. Details he wouldn't have told me. But he did tell me his "pants mess". We talked about it over lunch. He kept asking me if he could ride the bus again. Even again today. He will, tomorrow. How fast he grows.

Though he seems to think he is growing a little faster than we seem to think. He came home from school yesterday, and I fed him lunch, and put him to bed, normal routine things. His response was not routine. He didn't want to sleep. For 2 hours, I tried to get him to sleep, while I tried to sleep. It didn't work. He just kept calling for me, I was laying on the couch yelling, GO TO SLEEP! He did not. At one point, I started counting him into Time Out. When I asked, Do you want a timeout? "Yes! I wanna Tempe (timeout). Tempe! Tempe!" What kind of crazy boy wants to be pulled out of bed to be put into Time Out? My Crazy Boy. And I did. Couple times. But after 2 hours, and it was 4 p.m. I surrendured the fight on trying to get him to sleep. I suspect he must've fallen asleep on the bus. He didn't arrive home until a full hour after school got out. He is the last one on in the morning and likely the last off. I asked if he'd fallen asleep, when they pulled up, and they said, no, but I beg to differ by his behavior.

Today, we had preschool again, and then when i picked up Christopher we had to pop down to Riley. He had an appointment with Sara from the feeding team, for a weight check. I knew going in it wasn't going to be good news a. because of his recent illness he hasn't been eating and drinking, and b. his weight on Monday was 24 pounds, 10 ounces. Given his intake this week, I didn't think that had changed, which was going to be about half a pound down from where it was a month ago. And so it was. He clocked in at 24 pounds, 12 ounces. Now, it looks like he gained 2 ounces this week, and that's possible, truly, however those 2 ounces could also be variety in scales within the hospital since the weights were done on different scales. It's such a pain in the butt to be counting every single ounce that there a difference is made when he wears a sweatshirt or uses a different scale. I've been working on finishing his baby book in an effort to prepare for the new baby, and I realized today that Chris has only gained 4 pounds in a year and a half. It hurts my heart.

However, Sara, expected it. We had warned her was sick, that he wasn't eating, she wants to see us back in 3 weeks for another check. I was relieved that they didn't want us to start up the Feeding Tube again. We're going to start the peri-actin that Dr. M prescribed this weekend. One of it's side effects can be drowsiness and we wanted to be with him, if that is a possiblity rather than any changes missed because he's at a new school. Sara agreed wholeheartedly with this plan. It felt good, almost a good appointment amongst all the sad feelings of the last couple days.

And if all that wasn't enough, he fell asleep for 10 minutes (10!) in the car on the way home from Riley, and woke when I took his boots off. After requiring a diaper change, he was entirely too awake to take a nap today either. Today I only fought him for an hour and a half before surrenduring. But Mommy needed a nap, I'm not ready to give up naptime yet!

So, although he's not been sleeping by day, he's been sleeping great at night. Sunday, when we ventured out for the first time, we bought Chris some new sheets. Lightning McQueen Sheets! We decided to pull the air mattress from his big boy room, because he needed something a little warmer, like a real mattress, and a real pillow. He's now on sleeping on the floor with a real twin size mattress(covered in 2 waterproof, allergen free mattress pads) with a real pillow. Gotta give Lightning McQueen his kudos, he made the transition REAL easy. Chris saw those sheets come out of the laundry, and couldn't even wait for us to make and prep the bed. He demanded to use a sheet for Monday's nap! One would think he wouldn't be able to nap in the bed at all, since he's been passing the nights in it, but no. He's not been sleeping soundly, he's merped a couple times, but nothing real serious, just blanket arrangement stuff. He also found a new favorite book this week, Goodnight Gorilla. But the way he says gorilla, it's hysterical. "Do-willa-walla." So he calls it "Do night, Do-willa-walla". We've been reading it all week, he's even reading it himself. He loves it, and there's only like 10 words in the whole book. He loves saying goodnight to all the animals, and the look on the 'mommy's eyes' when she realizes she has an entire zoo in her bedroom, it makes him giggle every time. See, sometimes, he's still my baby boy. Doo night, do willa walla.

Seriously

Last night we ventured out for the first time since last Tuesday when we were told that Chris ought to stay away from other kids and at risk adults in the event he had Whooping Cough. We went to Target. It felt so nice to get out, fresh air, other people. Chris was not as enthusiastic as we, but he was in a good mood once we got inside. He was very excited that the purpose of our visit was to buy him sheets. He'd received Target the gift card for Christmas and we were cashing it in for a Big Boy Twin Size sheets�.in Lightning McQueen, if we could find them. We did, flannel Cars sheets with Lightning McQueen on them. It brought him great joy.

Though not as much joy as when we went to refrigerated food section to pick up sour cream. Mommy asked Daddy if we should pick up more honey flakey biscuits, which was our breakfast on Christmas and New Year's, a breakfast Chris actually ate along with us! Chris was like "I want Bistits!" OK, we bought more biscuits. While Eric was putting groceries from cart to car, I was putting Chris in his carseat. I asked him if he wanted to go out for dinner. "No. I wanna go home." OK. There was only a moment's pause when, "I want bistits." For dinner? I sat down in the front seat, and laughed and laughed. When Eric got in the car, I was re-telling the tale, and he asked Chris, you want biscuits? "Yes, I want bistits." (The way he says biscuits is hysterical and adorable!) I said, Seriously. From the back seat. "Seeyasly." OK. And Yes, he got a biscuit for dinner. And I laughed all the way home.

Now, in other serious news, we still don't have the official results of Christopher's Whooping Cough Test! Well, let me tell you, I got a little serious myself with the doctor's office this morning when I put my call in. First, I kept him home today from his First Day of Developmental Preschool. So, to the doctor's office I mentioned that, and how I was quite curious about these results. They explained how they sent to the state, like Eric hadn't already told me that. So I said, Well, yes, but I have an appointment at Riley today and I NEED to know if I'm allowed to take my son out of the house! That was slight exaggeration, as I was already planning on attending that appointment regardless, because when I called to try to reschedule, they told me first available was May. So, we were going, if I had to stop for a mask at the guard station to do so. But to Dr. C's office, they said we were ok to go to Riley. Since he's finished his course of antibiotics, he should theoretically not be contagious anymore. So, then I asked about Preschool? They agreed, provided he's not having coughing spells where he turns colors, which he's not, hasn't in days. He's only coughed like 3 times all day today and they were quick coughs. So, the boy is going to go to school in the morning! And he's going to start his new preschool on Wednesday. Hot Dog!

So, then we went to the Riley appointment. This was with Dr. M, the GI specialist. I like her. She was like, his belly feels good, he's happy (which he was), he's not complaining of pain, things are looking good. Chris probably would've been thrilled that she took our word that his bottom looked good, so she didn't do a rectal exam, knowing how closely that region is being examined by Dr. West. She also has a calm demeanor. The only bummer was that Chris's weight was down, to an all time fast drop down to 24 pounds, 10 ounces, which is like the loss of 12 ounces in a month. But, he hasn't been eating solid food for the better part of 2 weeks, he's only begun drinking his 3 milks day (or "cocoa", we call it when we add chocolate, for some reason cocoa goes down better than milk this last week) within the last 4 days. Anyway, she could've wanted to do something drastic, but she didn't. She says he doesn't have any �good leads', all his symptoms aren't really indicative of anything. For example, traditional allergic reactions have rashes or vomiting, or diarrhea. He has some diarrhea but he's on a daily laxative that stops if we stop it, and he hasn't puked since October. He could be just tiny, goodness knows I'm not, but my sister is and Eric used to get teased when he was young about being small. So, she opted for something a little different. Our nutritionist will be thrilled, she was suggesting it a year ago, a drug called Peri-actin. It's technically an anti-histamine, but with the great side effect of appetite stimulation. Dr. M has had great results with it, and wants to give it a go. The only problem is that sometimes, there's the side effect of drowsiness. So, we're going to wait until this weekend for him to get used to his new school, before drugging him. (My initial objection to school 5 days a week was that it would exhaust him, so I think that drugging him and sending him at the same time might be a bit much.) She was tickled by Chris, going for her stethoscope, and his ease at saying Ahhh. It's nice, non-invasive appointments like these that make Chris at ease at the doctors office. I like having this kind of Riley visit, where no pain is inflicted. It's like a record, that's two consecutive visits that have been easy on him.

I wish it was as easy on me. Feeding Team is not going to be happy about the weight loss, we see them later this week. Though I've emailed them a warning it's coming. I knew he was losing weight because I've noticed how skinny he is while naked, I can count every rib, and he feels bony when I pick him up. It's disturbing. I keep looking at his skinny self and it makes me sad. But Chris knows I think, I was looking at him this afternoon, we were having our post-nap cuddles and playing snowmen, his new favorite game, and I was thinking, how skinny you are, your clothes just hang on you. I didn't say anything, but he just looked at me and said "I fine." Odd. A. That he knew what I was thinking, and knew just what to say and B. That him telling me he's fine is so comforting.

This evening, as Eric was at church, I had my turn at doing bathtime. Normally, that's quality boy time, so Mommy is usually out of the groove, and last time Chris cried at me. But this time, I asked him if he wanted some toys. He alternated between yes and no when I offered him his elephant cup. But when I asked if he wanted a flute, he said Yes! Then he took it, and pushed it under water, and the air bubbles within tooted to the surface. I asked him, do flutes toots? Oh he thought that was hysterical! He laughed and laughed. Flutes Toots! Toots Flutes Toots. 10 good minutes putting that pipe under the water and listening to bubbling fart noises. Such a boy! And the laughing. Oh, I love his laugh, with his cold it's been a bit more gravelly than usual, now it's improving. He just kept laughing and laughing. When the novelty of the Flutes Toots began to wear off, I took his elephant cup and put it on my head. Hat! We giggled. Then I gently leaned forward, and it went crashing to the floor. Chris laughed so hard that he started to roll backward. Started to lose his balance actually and his arms flailed out to balance himself before he completely fell back in the water. That was almost funnier than the cup falling off my head. And we both laughed harder, surely both of our stomach muscles hurt. He just kept laughing so hard he'd wobble back. And I just laughed so hard I cried.

Waiting

So, we're waiting. Waiting to receive Christopher's test results to see if he officially has Whooping Cough. Dr. C told us to call him today, so that's what we did, put our call in first thing this morning. They returned our call this afternoon. They did not have the test results back. Eric begged, could they get some preliminary results because Chris was supposed to start school Monday? They checked. No. Apparently, our doctor's office sent us to the Hendrick's lab, and the lab people sent our test to the Indiana State Lab for the actually running of the test. Well, my hopes were just dashed. I worked for the county Lab, and let me tell you, I was the odd man out for staying late to get test results out to people before the weekend. That's not the way they run, and they're not running speedily with our test results either. So, we don't still don't know.

I hate waiting.

Whatever this illness is, now Eric and I have it. It's our turns to be snotty messes with chunky coughs, but frankly, the coughing spells don't turn us colors. So, I'm leaning heavily towards "it's not whooping cough" but going with Dr. C's original thoughts that it's some "viral crud". But I'm not willing to bet the health of harmless preschoolers on my hunch.

So, we stay inside. We debated going to the store today, but Eric's still feeling pretty down, so we stayed in. On the up side, I've discovered some really adorable things that Chris says. When he was coughing bad, I'd ask him if he'd want some Pittypats, which are gentle beatings on the back and shoulderblades that we used to do on my sister (the asthmatic) when she was little. Chris calls them "Pia-pats." Most of the time, he'll say "No. No Piapats", but sometimes, if he's feeling really crummy (which has NOT been in the last 3 days) he'll let me give them. I've also found that when we curl up on the bed to cuddle, I can't decipher if he's asking for cuddles or covers when he says "Tolos", so we do both. And it makes Mommy want to sleep so bad. Yesterday, I laid down on his sleeping bag bed I was so tired as I watched him play, and he proceeded to cover me up, read me a story (all by himself!), kiss me "doonight", turn off the light, and tap the music on the aquarium for me. He came back in 2 seconds later, "Doo Morneen!" Apparently 2 seconds is all the nap Mommy gets.

Watching the Ball Drop

Happy New Year!

I can't believe this boy. He's supposed to be sick! He's not feeling so sick that he doesn't pull on Mommy and Daddy and drive us a bit crazy. Last night, we put him to bed at 8:30, and Mommy and Daddy were planning on an exciting evening of snacking on frozen appetizers while watching movies. This boy woke up at 11:30, and was receptive to the idea of coming downstairs to "keep us company". We stopped our movie, inappropriate for boys, and watched Dick Clark's Rockin' Eve. We are so out of the groove, we knew none of the music or bands. Chris, however, was hypnotized, and eagerly watched the Ball Drop. Funny how both Daddy and Mommy move to kiss Chris for our first New Year's kiss instead of each other. How times change. It was odd to be home just the 3 of us on New Year's, quiet, and yet, quite nice. Then we all went upstairs, read, Rooster Can't Cock-A-Doodle-Doo and went to bed. The boy slept until 8. He's been acting like he feels just fine, he's just got a chunky cough, and a runny nose, not anything extreme that screams "whooping cough" to us. We are due to find out if he's got the cooties on Saturday. But for now we remain in isolation. No going out to play for us, but plenty of Veggie Tales and Horton, and his Christmas toys are getting lots of play. And Chris is thrilled with the endless chain of Pajama Days.